This body is getting old

I can’t breathe right now. My nose is fully plugged up, so my mouth is open to allow air into my poor old body.

I finally called in sick today. Not only is this cold getting to me, my back has been the main cause of my sleepless nights. To give some background, there has been a dull pain in my lower back for about a year now. I wasn’t able to sleep at all last night because there’s been a pain that’s been shooting down my leg from my back. And when I did fall asleep, I’d wake up because the pain was just so uncomfortable. Since I wasn’t working, I decided to make an appointment to see the doctor.

I haven’t seen the doctor since, oh, since I split my scalp open from snowboarding. They measured my weight. Then they asked me how tall I was. I said I wasn’t sure, but other nurses have told me 5′ 7″ or 5′ 8″. She asked if I wanted her to measure my height, so I said sure. 5′ 6″. FIVE SIX??? I must be getting old because I’M SHRINKING.

When the doctor came to see me, I answered all these questions. Then the doctor told me that it might be a pinched nerve. That would have been my guess too, from all those anatomy classes I took. So is that what my sciatic nerve feels like? Anyways, they took some x-rays and said they’d find out the results in a couple weeks. Until then, I’m supposed to take some motrin for the pain and attend some PT classes.

Ok, I gotta go lie down, cuz my left nose is flowin’ like Niagara Falls as I’m sitting here at my desk. Funny, when I’m lying down, it stops flowin, but then I just can’t breathe out of either nostril.